International recession got you down? Tired of wasting your days at home, applying for menial jobs in the insurance industry? Looking to take your first step into the heady world of online video game journalism?
Then you should probably apply to Kotaku or something.
If you like working long hours, are obsessed with LucasArts+*, and think money is for the Man, then perhaps we can work something out.
The Job: Contributing reviews for famous website Mixnmojo.com. You will be writing timely reviews of any games that we cannot review amongst the existing staff.
The Pay: Hahaha!
(No, seriously, there is no money.)
The Benefits: Guaranteed job in later life at Telltale Games! (See Jake Rodkin, Telarium et al.)**
You: Willing to purchase new games on day one! We do occasionally get review codes - especially for Telltale games - but they're never guaranteed. We're not asking you to buy every new game that comes out, because - hey - that's too expensive. If, however, you pick up a decent number of the latest LucasArts, Double Fine, Telltale and Autumn Moon titles already, then that's what we need.
Ownership of (or access to) a Kinect would also be considered as a valuable commodity. Who the hell even has one of those? (Except Remi, obviously.)
The Catch: See section 2, "The Pay". Also, there's a test:
If you think this is the job for you, then we want you to prove it to us. Write a 200 word (approx) review of any game in the Mojo database, and send it on to us at firstname.lastname@example.org. Don't freak out - just write it however you feel comfortable, and see what we think. What's the worst that could happen?
*Basically any games covered by this site - see here for details.
**Job at Telltale Games is not guaranteed.